Okay, so I've been arguing with myself again lately. And yes, sometimes much to the dismay of my family, its been out loud. Over the last few days, I've finally had the time to open my WIP. It seems I've also had the time to stare at it until I feel like I'm looking through a kaleidoscope filled with black and white images.While I sit there biting my nails and wishing for more interesting hallucinations, the problem finally occurs to me. Music of doom begins. I...must...make...changes.
Revisions are like that, I know. You send out your story. Someone reads it and makes all those suggestions that you have needed to know for so long. You're now armed with the tools to delete what needs to go. Keep what you need to keep. But sometimes, the story needs to change dramatically. Or at least some parts of it. And you think, well, I can't do that. Its not how it goes. But...why not? I mean, are we not the authors? I can change this or that. I can do whatever I want (right now anyway, I'm not published or even watched closely, it's a free for all over here). The point is, we should never feel so confined to our stories. I was accused of being "so open" by my beta and that made her happy and a little more relaxed. She didn't have to worry about hurting my feelings. I just had to worry about letting go of the things I needed to let go of and where to go from there. So, I did it. Yes...I...did.
I toasted a waffle (chill out, it was whole grain. I'm not an animal), sprayed on a fat free butter substance and some blackberry jam, circled the laptop a few times to work off the waffle and made my changes. I feel so alive. So free. I'm blaring the Sound of Music before the nights over just to piss off the kids kind of free. No, wait, I do that when I'm feeling mischievous.
With the sugar rush from the waffles( said they were whole grain, not sugar free) I was able to focus and make myself get to it. Every time I hit delete, the words "Can too" came out right after. Now, I just have to go back in there and delete a whole bunch of "can too's" from my WIP then I'll be golden. He he. Oops. Got a little jacked up, I think. Seems to happen to me a lot.